THE POWER OF YES

THE POWER OF YES

              As of late, I’ve been doing a lot of intensive training. I just ran my first Eventing Derby and Combined Test, which means that I rode my first dressage test and cross-country course on the same day. Obviously, I’ve put a lot of training into that, but I’ve also been helping out with some local cattle brandings and sortings. Nate roped off of Gabe for the first branding, so we had to do some preparation for that event as well.

              After Nate and I finished roping and doctoring a calf here on the ranch as part of our preparations, he decided that our horses needed a chance to move. Taking Gabe and Nate’s horse, Dunny, out around the lake, we rode them forward at a canter. Nate instructed me not to let Gabe run off, but to still let him set the pace and try to leave him as alone as I could. We cantered all the way around to the far side of the lake and then back.

              As we went along, Nate yelled over to me, “There is power in saying yes.” What he meant was that both his and my horse are very forward horses. They have a lot of “go” and we find ourselves constantly tapping the brakes. It’s very powerful to them when we can take them out and just say “yes” and let them be right for moving forward.

Forward Momentum

              That next afternoon, after Nate and I returned from the branding, I was watching Amy teach a lesson. The lady she was teaching rode a beautiful, sweet young mare. The first thing that Amy asked the woman to do was to move the horse forward in the trot. When they began, the mare just jogged along, her back hooves dragging slightly, and overall not using her body very properly. As the woman rode the horse more forward, the transformation in how the horse’s use of its own body was amazing. As she really started moving forward, the mare began picking up her rear legs and reaching forward and underneath herself. Her head and neck dropped down and forward, and she stretched and strengthened in her back.

              This was quite intriguing for me to watch, as Amy had been telling me constantly to move Gabe more forward in his trot for my dressage. As I watched this mare, I truly began to understand why they call it a “working” trot. The horse is supposed to be really engaging their body, ie. “working.” The horse finds a better natural balance when they are actually working and given a job.

When starting horses, the saying is, “forwards is your friend.” I talk about why a little bit in my previous blog Be Present. But this also applies, in a different way, to maturing horses as well. In the dressage scale, the base for everything is consistency in rhythm. Once that is established, then you look for relaxation so that the horse can move freely forward with no physical or mental tension. Collection is the last thing added, many stages later!

Quit Micromanaging

As the lesson progressed, the young mare that the lady was riding was trying so hard. She was offering all sorts of different things while trying to figure out what her rider wanted. For a while, she kept breaking into the canter when asked to go faster, as she didn’t understand yet just to trot faster. That is what you call a “right wrong answer.”

              As this continued, Amy simply encouraged the rider not to focus on telling her horse what not to do, but rather focus on what she wanted her to do. A lot of times we make riding a lot more complicated than it needs to be. We feel like there are so many different pieces that we need to hold together, and we end up micromanaging our horse. To me, this often feels like my body parts are going a thousand different directions at once. Instead if we can make the task simple and focus solely on it, then we can set it up in such a way that we just wait for our horse to find the right answer. Then all we have to do is say, “Yes!”

              Because of this, I felt a big change in how I use my hands during my dressage work. I have a hard time keeping my hands still and where they are supposed to be. I find myself moving them out or down to ask Gabe to stretch or lower his head. When Amy mentioned something that David O'Connor, (a gold-medal Olympian that Amy trains with in the winter) said to her, it clicked with me. He told her, “The rider stays stationary, the horse moves around the rider. It offers a better feel because the rider isn’t changing their balance all the time.” I began to realize that because Gabe understands there is relief in lowering his head and stretching, I don’t necessarily have to move my hands to ask him for that movement. I can be strong and soft without changing myself.

Look For the “Yes” Moments

              I know all too well the feeling when life gets crazy. Trust me, things can get pretty interesting here on the ranch! To go from riding the same horse in a branding to riding him in a jumping lesson within twenty-four hours can make your head spin a little bit. Sometimes, all I can do is focus on keeping my forward momentum.

              If life is out of control and you spend all of your time trying to chase down every loose thread, you’re going to feel pretty strung out, tired, and frustrated. Instead, if you choose to keep yourself balanced and grounded in who you are and focus only on what is truly important, you will give those around you better leadership, help, and advice. Being strong or soft does not mean you have to change yourself or where you are headed, but it is something you can change within yourself where you are.

              If you can be real and positive with yourself while staying focused on your path, then you will be able to see a lot of “yes” moments come your way. Sometimes they’re big, like graduating, but sometimes they’re something small, like enjoying a beautiful sunset at the end of a long day. Either way, if you can give yourself the relief to enjoy that moment and know that you did the best you could do, you will strive to find each YES.